A lesson about adoration.
Cast:
OZZIE – an excitable little monster
SQUIGGLY – Ozzie’s pet worm
MISS REBECCA – the teacher who sets him straight
Props:
None
(MISS REBECCA is on stage.)
MISS REBECCA: Today we are going to be talking about Mary Magdalene and adoration.
(OZZIE enters smacking his lips.)
OZZIE: That was de-licious.
MISS REBECCA: What was so good, Ozzie?
OZZIE: Oh. Hi, Miss Rebecca. I just had a sardine and sauerkraut sandwich. It was sensational.
MISS REBECCA: That's an interesting combination.
OZZIE: You should try it some time. I absolutely adore them.
MISS REBECCA: Funny you should mention adoring your sandwich, because we were just talking about adoration.
OZZIE: Strange how things happen like that in this class.
MISS REBECCA: Do you know what adore means?
OZZIE: Sure, I do! There's "adore" over there. Could you close it please. (laugh/snort)
MISS REBECCA: Ozzie!
OZZIE: Sorry, Miss Rebecca. Just teasing. Adore means to like somethin' a whole bunch like a sardine and sauerkraut sandwich.
MISS REBECCA: Sort of. It means to love something deeply. It comes from a Latin word meaning to give worship to something or someone.
OZZIE: Well, I don't like sardine and sauerkraut sandwiches that much.
MISS REBECCA: In Bible times, people would humble themselves to show adoration.
OZZIE: Kind of like Squiggly does with me.
(SQUIGGLY enters, shakes his head, then exits.)
MISS REBECCA: I don't know about that, but in Persia, people would bow before the king to show adoration.
OZZIE: I've seen stuff like that in the movies.
MISS REBECCA: Then they would have to kiss his knee.
OZZIE: Kiss his knee?!? Ew!! I never saw that in the movies.
MISS REBECCA: Then they'd have to fall on their face at his feet, striking the earth with the forehead...
OZZIE: Ow!!
MISS REBECCA: and kissing the ground.
OZZIE: Ew!! I don't know what's worse: kissing the king's knee or kissing the ground – and I've seen what Squiggly does on the ground.
(SQUIGGLY enters, stares at Ozzie, then exits.)
MISS REBECCA: The Jews would show adoration with a kiss.
OZZIE: That's more like it. I know I've kissed my sardine and sauerkraut sandwich before.
MISS REBECCA: But you don't really give it adoration do you?
OZZIE: It's awfully yummy, but I don't worship it. So, no.
MISS REBECCA: I didn't think so.
OZZIE: But I do adore a good sushi and succotash soufflé. (exits quickly)
MISS REBECCA: Ozzie!
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