Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Monster Church

Scripture Reference: Mark 11:15-18
So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. – 1 Corinthians 10:31
A lesson about the church.

OZZIE – an excitable little monster
MR. MIKE – the teacher who sets her straight


(MR. MIKE is on stage when OZZIE enters.)

OZZIE: Hey, Mr. Mike.

MR. MIKE: Hi, Ozzie. I haven’t seen you in a long time. I’ve missed you.

OZZIE: I missed you, too. You know (stage whisper) you’re my favorite teacher.

JEFF: (from behind the stage) I can hear you.

OZZIE: (looks down then shrugs) Anyway, I’ve been going to my church for the last few weeks.

MR. MIKE: Oh. What church is that?

OZZIE: Monster Church.

MR. MIKE: Monster Church?

OZZIE: Yeah, that where I go when I don’t come here. It’s a lot like this church, only more hairy.

MR. MIKE: Do you like it there?

OZZIE: It’s swell, but we have a hard time getting grownups to teach us in children’s church.

MR. MIKE: Why’s that?

OZZIE: Would you want to be in a room full of little monsters?

MR. MIKE: I see your point, but you have some grown-ups who help, don’t you?

OZZIE: Oh, sure. And we have lots of fun.

MR. MIKE: Like what?

OZZIE: We sing songs.

MR. MIKE: Bible songs?

OZZIE: No. But we have stories.

MR. MIKE: Bible stories?

OZZIE: No. We do memorize verses.

MR. MIKE: Bible verses?


MR. MIKE: Do you use the Bible at all?

OZZIE: Oh, yeah! We use one to prop up one end of our big screen TV.

MR. MIKE: Big screen TV?

OZZIE: Yeah! This morning we started watching Justin Bieber: Never Say Never. Our teachers say that it has great spiritual significance.

MR. MIKE: Doesn’t anyone actually read the Bible?

OZZIE: Oh, no. The teachers say they have a hard time understanding all of the Bible, so there’s no way we kids could ever understand it.

MR. MIKE: But don’t the teachers here read the Bible when you visit?

OZZIE: Oh, yeah. And they have kids memorize verses.

MR. MIKE: Bible verses?

OZZIE: Yeah. And they have stories.

MR. MIKE: Bible stories?

OZZIE: Yeah. And they sing songs.

MR. MIKE: Bible songs?

OZZIE: Yeah. So kids really can learn stuff from the Bible?

MR. MIKE: They sure can.

OZZIE: I think I’m gonna talk to my teachers about using the Bible more.

MR. MIKE: That’s a great idea, Ozzie.

OZZIE: But I think I’m gonna wait a week before I tell them.

MR. MIKE: Why wait?

OZZIE: Because I want to see how Never Say Never ends. That Justin Bieber is just so cute. (exits)

MR. MIKE: Ozzie!

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