Scripture Reference: Psalm 150
A skit that demonstrates that we should worship as worship.
Cast:
Pam – Worship Leader
Jeff – Person who doesn’t know how to worship
Props:
Musical instruments – preferably toy instruments (in case we run short, I have chopsticks that can be used as drumsticks) -- Note: Jeff should get the kazoo, since it has his germs on it. J
(After the hymn, Pam reads Psalm 150 and passes out instruments for the final praise song saying...)
Pam: This Psalm talks about praising God with instruments, so we are going to the same tonight.
Jeff: (looks at kazoo in a disgusted manner) You’ve got to be kidding!
Pam: What’s wrong? Don’t tell me you think THIS is girly.
Jeff: No, but the Psalm didn’t say anything about kazoos or maracas or even drums.
Pam: It mentions tambourines.
Jeff: Yeah, but not all of this other stuff.
Pam: The names of the instruments don’t matter. These were the instruments they had, and the psalmist is saying to celebrate God with everything you can. He is saying that we should praise God whether it is a trumpet or a kazoo.
Jeff: A kazoo. (plays it) This is kind of a rinky-dink instrument.
Pam: But if that is all you have use it. If you only have your voice, use it. We are suppose to consecrate everything to the worship of God. It’s not the instrument that matters; it’s what’s in your heart that matters.
Jeff: But this is going to be loud. And more than loud, it is going to be a cacophony.
Pam: Bless you.
Jeff: I didn’t sneeze. All these instruments are going to be a cacophony – loud, confused, and usually unharmonious sound. Noise, racket, din, not music.
Pam: So you are saying that you think it will be too noisy?
Jeff: Yes!
Pam: Well, it might be. In fact, I know it will be. But that’s okay.
Jeff: But I don’t like loud, noisy praise.
Pam: That’s okay, too. It’s not always about you.
Jeff: What?!?
Pam: It’s not always about you. It’s not always about me. We worship God in different ways, because different people praise God in different ways. God has made each of us different. So if we do a song you don’t like, then maybe that song is for someone else. Or if we praise in a way you don’t like, then maybe that is helping someone else worship God in a way that is meaningful to them.
Jeff: Well, then I am going to just talk to Melissa until you praise in a way I like.
Pam: That’s not what I said. All of us in this room are leaders. Whether we are in class in Sunday morning or in big church, there are people looking to us to see what we do. If we just sit there or if we look bored or if we talk to our friends, then we are leading others to not praise. You may be putting up an obstacle for someone that prevents them from singing the song in the style that God has chosen for them.
Jeff: That’s a big responsibility!
Pam: Yes, it is.
Jeff: So I have to be a leader even when we are singing?
Pam: Yep.
Jeff: Even when we are singing a song I don’t like or I am tired of hearing?
Pam: Yep.
Jeff: (picks up kazoo, looks defeated) Okay, then let’s do it.
Pam: Who knows, if you give it a try, you might accidentally have some fun.
Jeff: We’ll see. (Jeff gradually starts having fun.)
Scripture Reference: Job 1:13-22
A skit that demonstrates that we should worship in times of trouble.
Cast:
Pam – Worship Leader
Jeff – Person who doesn’t know how to worship
Props:
none
(During the first song, Jeff stops sings. He sits down looking sad and dejected.)
Pam: What are you doing, Jeff? Don’t tell me you are embarrassed by singing again?
Jeff: No.
Pam: You don’t think it’s girly or undignified?
Jeff: No.
Pam: Then what is it?
Jeff: Nothing.
Pam: It’s not nothing. You look like someone popped your balloon.
Jeff: I’ve just had a bad week. I don’t want to go into detail.
Pam: Well, if you want to talk…
Jeff: It’s just that we’ve been short staffed at work, and there is more work that can be done. We have clients screaming for help, and not enough time to help them. The phone keeps ringing, I am getting hundreds of email, my bossing is yelling…
Pam: I’m sorry to hear…
Jeff: Then I get home today and the kids are yelling and dinner isn’t ready and I can’t find all the CDs for tonight and…
Pam: I’m glad you don’t want to go into detail.
Jeff: What? Oh, sorry. Anyway, I’m just not up to worshiping. Worship is all about feelings, and I just don’t feel like it.
Pam: Worship is a lot more than just about your feelings. It isn’t just supposed to engage your heart. It is suppose to engage your mind, body, and spirit. In the book of John, Jesus says that “true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth.”
Jeff: Yeah, but if you’ve had a bad day…
Pam: Ever heard of Jōb? [NB: ō indicates to use a long O, as in "robe".]
Jeff: I don’t think so.
Pam: You know, Jōb – in the Bible. J-O-B, Jōb.
Jeff: I thought it was pronounced job.
Pam: No, it’s Jōb.
Jeff: Did he have a brother named Bōb?
Pam: What?!?
Jeff: Bōb. B-O-B.
Pam: That would be Bob.
Jeff: And did he eat corn on the cōb?
Pam: No.
Jeff: What about him?
Pam: What about who?
Jeff: Job
Pam: That’s Jōb, and he had a REALLY bad day. One day a messenger came to him and told him that his enemy had stolen all his oxen & donkeys and killed all his servants working in the fields.
Jeff: I bet that made him sōb.
Pam: That’s sob. Then another messenger came to tell him that fire had fallen from the sky and killed all the sheep and shepherds.
Jeff: That’s bad, but…
Pam: Then another messenger came to tell him that raiders had carried off his camels and killed his servants.
Jeff: That’s really bad, but…
Pam: Then another messenger…
Jeff: Not another messenger!
Pam: Yep, another messenger. This one came to tell him that while his sons and daughters were all together, a huge wind came up, blew down the house, and killed them all.
Jeff: Golly! That is a REALLY bad day! I had a great day compared to all of that!
Pam: That is probably one of the worst days anyone’s ever had.
Jeff: And you’re going to tell me that Jōb worshiped God after all of that?!?
Pam: Yes. Jōb 1:20-21 says: Then he fell to the ground in worship and said, "The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised."
Jeff: How could he do that? He just had his family wiped out?
Pam: When we remember that God is our Redeemer and that He truly loves us, we can rest in the knowledge that He is in control even when we don’t understand the reasons for what is happening.
Jeff: But how can I do that?
Pam: You have to prepare. You can’t wait until things get hard to trust God. You have to practice that when things are good. Spend time in His Word, talk with Him in prayer, stand in His presence in worship. You have to KNOW you can trust Him BEFORE the bad times. In the bad times, you will want to doubt, it is only natural. But if you have a foundation of trust already, you can stand on the foundation when the trust is hard.
Jeff: So worship is like getting into shape. You can’t wait until you are in the middle of a football game to start working out. You have to do that before the game, so that you are prepared.
Pam: Exactly. Worship is part of what makes us healthy Christians. And when we are in difficult times in our lives, it reminds us that God is our Rock and our Redeemer.
Jeff: Wow! If Jōb can worship after all of that, I guess I can, too.
Pam: That’s our jōb.
Jeff: Now don’t YOU start that!
Scripture Reference: 2 Samuel 6
A skit that demonstrates that we should worship with all our heart.
Cast:
Pam - Worship Leader
Jeff - Person who doesn’t know how to worship
Props:
none
(During the first worship song, Jeff becomes less and less involved with the song.)
Pam: (looking at Jeff, who ignores her) I want to see everyone singing this next song.
(During the next song, Jeff completely stops singing and sits down.)
Pam: Jeff, what are you doing?
Jeff: What? I’m singing. Didn’t you see my mouth moving?
Pam: Praising God is more than just moving your lips. It is thanking God for being our Provider. It is thanking him with your whole heart.
Jeff: Yeah, but it’s kind of embarrassing. I mean, singing in front of people. What if they hear my voice? I don’t always hit all the right notes. And moving around? I am not the most graceful guy. I could trip over a cordless phone.
Pam: You’re not suppose to be singing for any of these people.
Jeff: There’s no one else here.
Pam: You’re suppose to be singing for God.
Jeff: Oh, yeah. But singing and dancing around is kind of… (whispering) girly.
Pam: What about a football player who dances around after making a touchdown?
Jeff: Okay, but it’s kind of undignified to do it in church. Aren’t you suppose to be quiet in church?
Pam: Yes, there are times when we need to be quiet. We don’t want people up dancing around while Pastor Ty is preaching, but there is a time to celebrate God.
Jeff: Yeah, but....
Pam: What if I told you that I know a famous warrior who danced for God?
Jeff: Who?!?
Pam: David.
Jeff: David? The David? King David? David-and-Goliath David?
Pam: Yes. In 1 Samuel there is a story about the Ark of the Covenant being stolen by the Philistines and placed in a tent with an idol.
Jeff: Kelly Clarkson?
Pam: What?!?
Jeff: You said it was placed in a tent with an idol. Was it Clay Aiken?
Pam: Not an American Idol! A statue of their god Dagon. When they came in the next morning, Dagon was lying on the ground.
Jeff: I guess it wasn’t a very idle idol.
Pam: They put it back in place, and the next morning, it was on the ground with its arms and legs broken off.
Jeff: Talk about it costing an arm and a leg.
Pam: Right.
Jeff: I guess it didn’t have a leg to stand on.
Pam: Any more?
Jeff: One more: Did anyone give him a leg up?
Pam: Are you done now?
Jeff: Um.... Yes.
Pam: Thank you. So the Philistines send word to David to come get the Ark, because Israel’s God was more powerful that Dagon.
Jeff: Sweet.
Pam: David led thirty thousand men to get the Ark. The all danced and sang and played instruments all the way back.
Jeff: That’s bigger than Mardi Gras!
Pam: King David took off his kingly robes and celebrated with everyone else.
Jeff: He was naked?!?
Pam: No, he was dressed like everyone else, because he wanted to be just part of the parade. It was about God; not him.
Jeff: The people probably all loved that.
Pam: Well, not everyone did. His wife Michal thought it was vulgar and undignified. Because of her attitude, God cursed her.
Jeff: Ouch!
Pam: David, on the other hand, humbled himself. He didn’t praise God to impress anyone or to show how spiritual he was. He wanted to celebrate God’s provision. 2 Samuel 6:14 says that David “danced before the Lord with all his might.”
Jeff: And the Bible says that David was a man after God’s heart. I guess this was part of the reason why.
Pam: You got it.
Jeff: Okay, if David can do it, so can I. Let’s praise God!
(During the next song, Jeff sings whole-heartedly – maybe even dances.)
Scripture Reference: Proverbs 18:13
A blues song about listening before we speak.
Cast:
FAT DADDY THORNTON – an old blues singer (this name can be changed to match the person doing the character)
MESSENGER – who whispers in his ear
Costume:
Something to evoke Fats Waller, Muddy Waters, or John Lee Hooker.
Props:
I use a kazoo, but a guitar, harmonica, etc. could be used for the blues chords. Could also use an accompanist.
(FAT DADDY THORNTON enters and sits down.)
FAT DADDY THORNTON: Hello, chillen. My name is Fat Daddy Thornton, and it is so good to be back with ya this evenin'. I wanna sing ya a song about a buddy of mine, and it goes exactly like this:
(wa waaa waa wa) My buddy said he'd be callin'
(wa waaa waa wa) I bet he's got some news
(wa waaa waa wa) But now I think he be stallin'
And he's givin' me the blues.
What we have here is
The Failure to Communicate Blues
(wa waaa waa wa) What if he don't like my hat?
(wa waaa waa wa) Or what if hates my shoes?
(wa waaa waa wa) He could make fun of this or that
And really give me the blues.
What we have here is
The Failure to Communicate Blues
(wa waaa waa wa) What if he disses my singin'?
(wa waaa waa wa) Or has a thing against kazoos?
(wa waaa waa wa) Then his neck I'll be wringin'
For givin' me the blues.
What we have here is
The Failure to Communicate Blues
(wa waaa waa wa) What if he attacks me
(wa waaa waa wa) With a mob of kangaroos?
(wa waaa waa wa) And if the big one smacks me
Then I'll have the black & blues.
What we have here is
The Failure to Communicate Blues
(wa waaa waa wa) What if he's a pi-rate?
(wa waaa waa wa) And lights his cannon fuse?
(wa waaa waa wa) Then in glee he'll gyrate
While I get the blues.
What we have here is
The Failure to Communicate Blues
(wa waaa waa wa) What if he's an alien?
(wa waaa waa wa) Who turns my brains to ooze?
(wa waaa waa wa) He's prob'ly not even mammalian
Oh, baby, I got the blues.
What we have here is
The Failure to Communicate Blues
[MESSENGER enters and whispers in FAT DADDY's ear. FAT DADDY nods] What? Uh-huh. Really? Okay.
(wa waaa waa wa) My buddy's on the telephone
(wa waaa waa wa) Asking what movie I choose
(wa waaa waa wa) I guess I shoulda known
And avoided these blues.
What we have here is
The conclusion-jumpin', problem-bumpin'
Failure to Communicate Blues
(wa wawawawawawawa)
Thank you very much, everybody.
(FAT DADDY THORNTON exits to thunderous applause.)
Scripture Reference: Matthew 7:1-6
A blues song about not judging others.
Cast:
FAT DADDY THORNTON – an old blues singer (this name can be changed to match the person doing the character)
[Blues Name Generator The Blues Name Generator]
Costume:
Something to evoke Fats Waller, Muddy Waters, or John Lee Hooker.
Props:
A guitar, harmonica, etc. for the blues chords. Could also use an accompanist. I use a kazoo.
(FAT DADDY THORNTON enters and sits down.)
FAT DADDY THORNTON: Hello, chillen. My name is Fat Daddy Thornton, and I've been singing the blues since before any of you was born. If fact, I think I have underwear old than you.
This evening, I will be accompanying myself on the traditional blues kazoo. I'd like to do my latest song for y'all; I wrote while I was walking over to the chair: It is about one of the darkest, most tragic times of my life. It is about an event that plunged me into the depths of despair and misery. I hope you enjoy it:
(wa waaa waa wa) Woke up this mo'nin'
(wa waaa waa wa) Thought I would die
(wa waaa waa wa) Started moaning and groaning
Got a speck in my eye
I got those speck in my eye
Think I'm gonna cry-y-y blues.
(I tell ya, it hurts much too much.)
(wa waaa waa wa) Got me some Visine
(wa waaa waa wa) I sprayed and I sprayed
(wa waaa waa wa) Despite my ocular hygiene
That speck just stayed and it stayed
I got those speck in my eye
Ain't there nothin' else I can buy-uy-uy blues.
(I'm in need of some serious help.)
(wa waaa waa wa) I saw my buddy
(wa waaa waa wa) My buddy Frank
(wa waaa waa wa) He said he would help me
But in his eye was a plank
I got those speck in the eye
Why me, oh why-y-y blues.
(I'm fadin' fast, baby.)
(wa waaa waa wa) He said he would snatch it
(wa waaa waa wa) Never mind the board
(wa waaa waa wa) He was a-grabbin' and a-scratchin'
Oh help me, Lord
I got those speck in the eye
Please send some other guy-uy-uy blues.
(Oh please, Lord, send someone else.)
(wa waaa waa wa) I grabbed his neck
(wa waaa waa wa) As I started to groan
(wa waaa waa wa) You can't take out my speck
When you gotta plank of your own
I got those speck in the eye
Least I don't have a plank in mi-i-ine blues.
(Oh yeah, you gotta get rid of that log.)
(wa waaa waa wa) So this is the moral
(wa waaa waa wa) Of my story today
(wa waaa waa wa) You see, that door'll
Hit you when you go away.
Cause you got those plank in your eye
You gotta fly-y-y blues.
(I'm outta here, baby. Thank you very much.)
(wa wawawawawawawa)
(FAT DADDY THORNTON exits to thunderous applause.)
