A lesson in truth and the one true God.
Cast:
DILLY – a southern fried chicken who doesn’t always get things straight
MISS REBECCA – the teacher who sets her straight
Props:
Something to make crashing sounds (e.g., pots & pans)
(MISS REBECCA is on stage when DILLY enters.)
DILLY: (from backstage) SQUAWK! (rustling then crashing)
MISS REBECCA: Dilly! Are you okay?
DILLY: (enters) Why I’m finer than frog hair, Miss Rebecca.
MISS REBECCA: What in the world was all that commotion?
DILLY: Oh that. I was simply attempting to fly.
MISS REBECCA: Fly? Dilly, chickens can’t fly. They can’t get enough lift to overcome gravity.
DILLY: Well, that is a popular perception, but I have been studying on this subject. I’ve come to the conclusion that I don’t believe in gravity.
MISS REBECCA: Don’t believe in gravity?!? Gravity is a fact, not just a matter of opinion.
DILLY: That would be your opinion.
MISS REBECCA: Then how to explain that things always fall down instead of up?
DILLY: It’s a cultural thing. We as a culture have decided that we prefer that things fall down, so they fall down.
MISS REBECCA: So if I decided that I’d prefer that things fall up, they’d fall up?
DILLY: I do declare that you are beginning to latch on.
MISS REBECCA: Oh I “latch on.” I just don’t agree.
DILLY: Then you are as close-minded as a vault door.
MISS REBECCA: I don’t want to be so open-minded, though, that my brains fall out.
DILLY: Well, I’ve never been so insulted.
MISS REBECCA: (aside) The day’s still early.
DILLY: I beg your pardon!
MISS REBECCA: Nothing. So how’s the whole not-believing-in-gravity thing working out for you?
DILLY: Not as well as I’d hoped. It seems that every time I try to fly, I fall to earth like a bag of wet cement.
MISS REBECCA: And why do you think that is?
DILLY: Maybe if I just believe harder.
MISS REBECCA: Really? You already believed hard enough to try to fly. Do you really think you could believe harder?
DILLY: Maybe a bitty bit harder.
MISS REBECCA: It wouldn’t help. When something is true, it’s true no matter how hard you believe or don’t believe it.
DILLY: Well if that don’t put the pepper in the gumbo.
MISS REBECCA: Some things are just true: gravity, mathematics, God.
DILLY: Well of course God is true. You’d have to be a few fries short of a Happy Meal to think that God isn’t true.
MISS REBECCA: Exactly. God is true. Gravity is true.
DILLY: Oh my lands! I need to find Flora quicker than a rat up a drain. I fear I may been a bit too convincing in telling her gravity isn’t real, because I do believe I heard her say something about going to the top of the chicken coop and trying to fly. Flora! FLORA! (exits quickly)
MISS REBECCA: (stares at the stage surprised by DILLY’s sudden departure)
DILLY: (reappears) I almost forgot – bye, y’all! (disappears)
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